Because of how little parents know about parenting when they have their first kid, it can take a toll on the kid sometimes, as it did with me. However, the parents aren’t always the ones who hurt us. Sometimes, it’s also the siblings. They don’t understand the experience because they weren’t you. Many of them often think you’re being dramatic or that there was nothing different about the way your parents raised you in comparison to the way they raised your siblings. This ignorance, in my personal experience, has led to a divide between us. They downplay the effects of being the oldest child. They think it’s “not a big deal” or “no one cares” or even “it’s not that deep.” I hate to say it, but it is that deep. Every argument I’ve had with my parents has led to them being better parents for my siblings. Every time I’ve rebelled, I’ve made a statement to my parents that will stay with my siblings for a lifetime. They won’t have to live the way that I did because I did it for them.

Now, this experience is entirely personal, and it may not be the same for everyone. But I hope I’m not alone in this.